The Three Things

67.

I stand over her and provide the necessary time for the processing of the three items and their immediate ramification. We have to hurry but more importantly she needs to understand the play. Completely. The Three Things are: 1) BREAKOUT - TAKE ME HOSTAGE. 2) FOLLOW MY LEAD, 3) TRUST ME. NOW! I silently count backwards from ten in Italian, just for practice, and when I get to due, she stands and in a command voice says, “Let’s do it.”

If there was any lingering question in my mind about her having the ‘it’ factor it is removed when she crumbles the note and eats it. I reach into my coat pocket and call for the guard. As she enters the cell I swiftly plunge the needle into her neck. She goes down like an elephant the carfentanil was developed to instantly sedate. I drag the guard as far as possible inside the small space. The block guard must have heard the abnormal sounds and enters the cell to investigate. She sees me dragging the drugged guard and reaches for her stun gun. With explosive accuracy Vi steps in and disarms the guard with a flawless front-kick knocking the gun to the floor. Vi finishes the takedown with a spinning side kick to the block guard’s jaw. I move in to administer a dose of the carfentanil and drag her limp body next to the other. Using their own handcuffs I secure each to the steel bed frame and pull the roll of surgical tape from my pocket and seal their mouths. We need to buy another fifteen-minutes if we are to pull this off and the clock is running. I remove their weapons and phones, and drop them in the toilet. I retrieve the stun gun and hand it to Vi with an up-down look at her feet and back. She gets the visual and says, “Third Dan Tae Kwon Do.” 

As we are hustling down the hall I lay out the next move and fish a pellet from my pocket and place it under my tongue. I am putting all our eggs in the next basket as I ruffle my hair and bite down on the pellet. I give Vi two syringes of the potent tranquilizer. As planned, I enter the warden's office and show the receptionist/secretary my bloody face. She rises from behind her desk as I barge in on the warden who appears to be considering 57 across. The receptionist cries out, the warden stands and I deliver my lines.

“The prisoner has escaped, I tried to slow her down but she is loose and armed.” I make a clumsy move to use his phone, a ploy to keep him from initiating the general alarm or a lock-down when Vi runs into the room, shows us the guard’s stun gun and commands the three of us to lay on the floor face-down with our arms behind our heads. I am the first one to comply, leading by example. Swiftly Vi delivers the paralyzing cocktail and I count it down from ten. 

“Excellent. So far so good. Two more to go.” I look at my watch and note we are night on schedule, almost a minute fast. We hog-tie the pair, tape their mouths and I pull the phone cord from the wall. I pat them both down and toss a pager and a burner from the wardens trousers towards Vi. She puts them in a file cabinet drawer and slides it shut. 

We are trotting down the hall towards the main entrance as I verbally outline the third act. 

We make the final hallway turn and I shuffle towards the guard trying to clean my face with a handkerchief. I get to the scanner and greet him as calmly as I can. I pass through and grab the bin which sits in the same place I left it. Vi turns the corner and runs right at the guard screaming for us to get our hands in the air. I do as instructed watching the guards response. This is the moment of truth. If he decides to be a hero I will have to counter his move. Vi commands him to lay face-down on the floor, finishing with the standard, “do as I say and nobody gets hurt.” She then looks at me spitting the same command but adding, “you too ass-wipe.” I comply and listen as she breaks protocol and fires a 

dart into the back of the guard. There is no time to question her decision so I chance an adverse reaction and plunge a needle into his neck. We quickly disarm and cuff him to the scanner frame and toss his cell phone and pager back down the hall. 

We are at the front door and I can see the guard in his booth and the big black Expedition patiently waiting behind the fence. I lay out the choreography and ask for questions. None. I need twelve-seconds. GO.

I hit the steps and glide towards the guard. He seems unaware of anything abnormal. At the halfway point I reach for my cell phone and enter the code. A red Ford Extra-Duty F 350 explodes. The guard is stunned and by the time he regains composure I am on him. Vi arrives twelve-seconds later and we make a show of her taking me hostage and ordering the guard to kiss the floor. Heavy lifting done, we run to the Expedition where I spit gravel and dirt out of the parking lot. I wonder whose Ford I just torched. 

“I apologize for not having anything more appropriate, but in that bag,” I say pointing the back seat, “is my workout gear. Change into them fast. We have five minutes before the exchange and we don’t need you wearing those frumpy overalls and looking like an escaped felon.”

“Exchange?”

“There should be an Uber waiting, take it to the Vagabond Inn on Colony Street, and get a room. Wait for me there. I need to dump this rig.” I say watching the speedometer reach 70 on the deserted arterial. 

“Things are going to get real hot real quick around here. We are heading for San Diego on the next express. Do not talk to anyone in the meantime.” I hand her my credit card and a fifty dollar bill. 

We get to the rendezvous location and she hops out now sporting my baggy gray sweats, VMI hoodie and Baltimore Orioles ball cap. 

“I’ll see ya soon,” I say, “you done real good.”

“Thanks, that was fun.” 

“Phase one done, NOW it gets interesting.” 

I see the Uber coming into the parking lot and drive away.