Saturday, January 19, 2019

Clock is Ticking



What exactly is the issue? Are you trying to tell me that your pitiful situation compels you to sacrifice the one thing that, above all others, is the goal? Or is it that your complacency, your level of relative ease, your privilege or the security of your comfort zone is worth more (is safer) than risking it for something greater? What level of weakness does it take to choose the easy path, the one with little or no risk or reward? How the hell did you get so good at convincing yourself that you are somehow incapable, unprepared or unworthy of this monumental challenge? What happened to your spine, your guts and your balls? 

Let us be clear on this one important point. The only race playing it safe will ever win is the rat race. And even then you're still a rat. I would much prefer to be Mighty Mouse or Modest Mouse, smaller, animated, fearless and crafty, or humble, compassionate and mindful, that the larger, stronger, greedy and corrupt rat. More important than the variety of rodent is its intent. Your goal is not the simple hierarchy of needs rule one of survival, it is the search for expression and the myriad tangential  experiences found only on the rocky road to self understanding. 

When the seagull challenges you to drop everything and follow your heart, you unquestioningly obey. Knowing that the risk of failure, the pain of rejection, the toll on energy and capitol, and the time spent in pursuit are each very small entry fees to pay. 

Or you can stay home, turn up the heater, order a pizza and bend back another pull tab. 

So what, exactly, are your issues? In a wonderfully successful exchange two nights ago a promising athlete confessed to me that she has observed in herself a tendency for self-sabotage in her training. Usually when confidence and focus are most needed, a few weeks prior to the show. 

This is not easy. The degree of difficulty associated with athletic, academic (or ascetic) success is the major reason why its gifts are so rewarding. Going through the minefield of training, the relentless search for improvement, finding harmony in mind, body and spirit as we progress, dealing with setbacks, injuries, soreness, rainy days and sleepless nights is a challenge worthy of the Navy kind of seals. This is not for everybody. 

Those that ‘make it’ will quickly see just how important a role the mental part plays. Your mindset must be a powerful reminder of the bigger picture. We do this for growth, to test ourselves against the day, the allure of sloth, the seduction of the bright and shiny new toys, and our shadow desires to toss in the towel with resignation and a ‘fuck it’. The minute, the very nanosecond, that we sense this, when we hear that negative voice, we must steel ourselves to turning that weak inner quitter to a compassionate, humble and grateful warrior, and quietly (sometimes) simply carry on.  We will never take the beach if we all go home for lunch. You will never find true love if you resent yourself and Rome wasn’t built in a day. We must rise to the occasion and ride into battle. Once this allusive skill becomes your default reaction the final stage is about flow. Courage under fire. Your ability to remain focused once the conditions and circumstances turn towards the dramatic. Perhaps like right now. 

Hear the sage advice of the gull. Be there at sunrise. Listen. Open your heart to the song of the sea. Notice that mouse be as modest as mighty (as she seeks the perp who stole her cheese.) You can be seal-like. We can start with our next breaths. Make solid and strong decisions. Face your issues with brutal honesty and vow improvement. 

It is all connected. And the clock is ticking. 

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